Tullist – At Yir Meksa

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Agadir i d-iḥebsen illel mačči d ameẓẓyan, yecba lḥiḍ yulin kan akken : iseggem, yeεdel, yuli fell-as lehcic d tadliwin. Ddaw-s yella wasif i igezmen iḥerqan, yettawin γer yillel anda yesgunfuy.

Agama yebna tiɣaltin. Iḥemmalen nejṛen iberdan i yiɣezṛan almi uɣalen amzun d dduḥ i deg gnen (gellen?) waman. Ma tewwiḍ abrid d asawen, ad tafeḍ taddart tsenned ɣer tiɣilt; ur (d)as-ittcuḥḥu ara uqebli yal tikkelt i deg ara d-isuḍ fell-as. Ixxamen myiḥnacen amzun yenɣa-ten usemmiḍ, msennaden wa ɣer wa am yiguza n waḍil. D ayen yecban lekdeb! Agama yessureg-d akk ayen yekseb d ccbaḥa ɣef wemḍiq-nni, Dinna i sεeddaɣ anebdu iɛeddan, ɣer yiwen wemdakel-iw. Axxam-is iqubel adrar am lemri. Yal mi ara beddeɣ ɣer ṭṭaq, ad waliɣ yal tizegzewt akked yisegla yernan sser i wedrar. Adrar ixaḍ s tberdatin; yal yiwet sani i tettawi, sani tessufuɣ. Abeḥri azedgan yettasen seg yillel ; akken ara kikcem ɣer turin, ad tḥulfuḍ s tudert tegra-ak irebbi…

Illel ur yebεid ara ɣef wexxam ideg ttiliɣ, ɣas akken iberdan ḍeyqen, meεna sufuɣen akk, Mi ara tawḍeḍ ɣer yiri n yillel, ad tafeḍ yeččur d iẓra ilegɣanen, i tecḍen, yeḥfan seg lemwaǧi iten-idyettẓuṛun yal ass. D asawen mi ara d tmuqleḍ, d agadir ara k-id-imagren.

Amḍiq-agi isem-is: « At Yir Meksa !», Gan-as isem-a ɣef ubaxix d-yeḍṛan deg-s aṭas aya …Aberrani ara d-yerzun ɣer At Yir meksa d tamsalt tamezwarut i ɣef ara yesteqsi: Amek almi i as-gan isem am wa ? Wid yessnen, ttalsen-d tadyant-a ɣef yiwet n tallit akken-nni, tallit i deg tedder taddart-a ddaw leɛnaya n yiwen n ccix n lǧamaε, i d-yesbedd Udabu, akken yexdem akk i tuddar n Yiqbayliyen yebɣan ad idirent ddaw leɛnaya d tṣunḍa n Inselmen, ad rnunt ad ddarin tacḍaṭ-is.

Ccix-a yewεer, d ssem, yessexdam ula d iɣil d wuzzal, mi ara yeffeɣ walbɛeḍ i leɛṣem-ines. D netta i la isedduyen timsal di tejmaɛt, ama d tid yerzan taɛerfit, ama d tid n tdamsa d wayen-nniḍen, Yal cci s ccreɛ n Ṛebbi ara yeddu, amdan ur yesɛi awal sdat ccreɛ n yigenni…

Yusa-d ccix-a si tmurt taberranit. Yeɣra Leqran d tcerɛit, tussna n tdeyyanit, di tmurt n Maser. Asmi yessaweḍ d limam, yemmed di tmusni ! ceyyɛen-t-id am netta am wiyaḍ i d-yusan ɣer tmurt n Yiqbayliyn ad cixen di temsal-agi n tineslemt, xas ulamma tamurt tella ur txus ara deg yimusnawen. Ccix-a(gi), ihi, ur iqebbel i yiwen ad yeddu wer laqwanen n Ṛebbi i s yettamen. Ayen nniḍen ɣur-s ur yesεi ara lmeεna. Ulac acu i izemren ad yekk nnig lqanun n tcerɛit i d-yefka Wucbiḥ Ameqran, akken yeqqar.

Ur icuḥ ara ula ɣef yiman-is, akken kan ad ibeggen i wiyaḍ belli ur yelli d win yessurufen, neɣ d win iqeblen lexṣas d leɣlaḍ, akken yebɣu yili. Yezmer tikwal, ad yeqqen tiṭ-is ɣef kra n temsal, maca ɣef temsalt n tayri, ulac ! Ula d isem-is mi (d)-as-isla, ad irekkem si zzeεf, yettemεuqu seg-s. Limmer ahat seg wid iḥemmlen i yella, neɣ seg wid iwulfen sebganen-d iḥulfan-nsen, ttaken lebɣi d lqima i wayen i s ttḥulfun, ur tefren, ur ttetḥin s tayri, tili ur yettili ara akka : tili zzεaf, ddɣel d lkeṛh ur ttaččaṛen ara ul-is. Maca ul-is yuli-t wadal, yedɣel, ala s tebrek n tiṭ i yessikid ɣer wid yeččuṛen d niyya, am wakken i yeččuren d asaɣur wid yezgan ttexnunusen deg waluḍ, ḥfan deg iḥerqan yesseknef yiṭij, i deg ithemmej ddunit yal ass, almi ur d teǧǧi deg-sen ala iziɣer-nni ineṭḍen di tbuḥcict yettṣubbu yettali. Γur-s, imesdurar d lmal yettakken lebɣi i win i ten-yezzuɣuren, yettawin lewhi s wallen mi ara yeskeɛɛrir fella-sen, imifat (?) niyya mazal-itt deg-sen. D ayenni i d-yiwwin ccix ɣer taddart-nni, am wid i t-icban « yetkellixen medden s laxert !», yufa abrid d wanida ara icax akken i as-yehwa..

At taddart ttidiren s wayen isen-d-ifka wass-nsen, teddun kan akken yella lḥal, ayen isend-tefka tudert ad t-magren, xas s yifassen d ilmawen. Yeẓra (ccix n lǧamaε ) ur llin d wid ur nessin dacu-tt tayri maca, netta ɣur-s tayri n tidet d tin yellan ger wemdan d Rebbi-is. Tagi ur tt-ssinen, ur tt-tissinen, ɣur-s ttemlilin akken ttemlilin lehwayec di teẓgi. Ikṛeh-iten d qeḍran, mi ara tenittwali amek ittḥsisen i ccehwat ur nesεi lmaεna i d-itekken seg-sen, neɣ mi ara isell i yemɣaṛen d yilmezyen, di tejmaεt, ttmeslayen, ttawin-d isefra ɣef tuẓuft d iḥulfan n tayri, isefra n yimeksawen, wala ad ẓẓallen, d tmucuha d yettmeslayen ɣef wannect-nni. Ayen-nni yakk ittwali-t d tiquḥbent i yesufuɣen ɣer lkaf d tmest n Jahennama! D ayen i t-id-sɣunfuyen, d ayen i irennun i wedrar-nni n tismin d lkeṛh yellan deg-s, i yesmentagen ajajiḥ n wurfan yuɣen di tfekka-s, asif-nni n Lkuter yellan di lǧennet ur t-issexsay ara! Ayen i la tineqqen ugar, d ayen yebɣa i yiman-is ur t-id iṣaḥ ara, i yettagi i wiyaḍ, d ayen i la (d) as-d-tessutur tfekka-s i yebɣa ad yesfeḍ ɣer wiyaḍ. Ayen yellan deg-s d lɛib i yettwali di medden, wi yeẓran!? Yebɣa ad yeḥreṣ wiyaḍ, akken ad tεiwnen ur iteččeḍ ara, ur ixeddem ara ayen i t-idyeččan si daxel, yeqqaṛ « Ur illaq ara tulawin ad ffɣent seg wexxam, ttwaxdament i wexxam i dderya, ayen-nniḍen d ccɣel n wergaz…».

Yiwet n tikkelt, yebɣa ad asen-ikkes ula d tala ! Ccix yuggad i ixeddem, limmer ad iwali tameṭṭut di beṛṛa weḥd-s. Mi ara ɛeddint tullas ɣer tala ggarent-d wallen-is seg wakken tafekka-s teknef si daxel, sakkin ad t-tafeḍ ixezzu irennu deg-sent. Tameṭṭut ɣur-s d cciṭan, tella kan akken ad tkellex i wergaz, ad tesseɛreq abrid n ṣṣwab, ad ttawi yid-s ɣer tmest n Jahennama! Γef wannect-a i yebna yakk uxemmem-is, akka i as-slemden lecyax-is di Maṣer ; ɣef wannect-a i tebna ddunit. Si Adem d Ḥewwa akka ; d netta i tt-id-yessufɣen si Lǧennet m-leqwas. Ayen akk yeεnan tafekka ( ladɣa tin n tmeṭṭut ) inexz-itt, yexza-tt ɣur-s ur iqerreb. S nnig tmuɣli-yagi i s ittwali tudert, ccix ur yettaṭṭaf ara urfan. Ittcuddu-tt ula anda tban i medden teyser, iḥerres iman-is ula ɣef temsal ur neswi. Dayen yesseḍeṣayen tikwal at taddart, aladɣa tilmeẓyin d yilmeẓyen, sɛan-t d tireṣṣilt di yal tikelt, mi ara ten-id-yawi webrid sdat lǧamaε, netta akken-nniḍen ur sen-yekmi ara.

Ma yella d imɣaren yettilin di lǧamaε, yal mi ara d-ffɣen, qqaren :« Awah ! Ccix-agi nneɣ iḥres timsal, yeṭṭef-itt-id si ẓmik, yiwen n wass ad tt-ijbed ad teqqerṣ! ». Maca nutni iɣeblan-nsen ur yelli d ayen ara yefru ccix s tẓẓallit d ddkir n yal ass…Akken qqaren : « Taẓallit ur teseččay ara aɣrum. Wwet iɣil-ik a bu yiɣil ! »

Γef wakken i d-ttalsen, yiwet n tikelt, cwiṭ i t-ifiɣ leεqel seg reffu. Sawlen-as-d, akken yiwen n wass ad iwali yiwet n tmeṭṭut tuḍen, yiwen ur iẓri acu i tt-yuɣen. Ulac sani ur tt-iwwin ara, tugi ad tawi iri. Yegra-d usirem aneggaru, ceyyɛen ɣer ccix, ahat d netta ara as-d-yafen ddwa n ḥellu, imi yegza timusniwin ur gzin nutni ! Ccix yiwwi abrid, ddac ddac almi yiwweḍ s axxam n yiɛerḍiyen ( n yineɣrimen). Akken kan i yekcem s afrag n wexxam-nni, yaf din arrac, deg usarag, tturaren. Ttmuqulen yiwet n teydit ( taqjunt ) tettarew din ɣef yiri n webrid. Akken i ttiwala ccix, yedduqqes, ibeddel wudem-is, tuli-t-id tezweɣ, din din tuɣal d tewreɣ, yessetḥa seg wayen iwala, neɣ yexleɛ, ur yeẓri yiwen dacu i t-yuɣen imiren, dɣa yuẓ ad iẓer ugar acu akka. Yufa arrac zzin i teydit-nni am umeqyas, ḥeddren i yiḍan imecṭaḥ mi d-ttlalen amzun d ttefaḥ i diɣellin : « yiwen, sin, tlata…», iḥettben iḍan i la d-ittlalen, dɣa ṭṭreḍqen d taḍsa… Argaz amcum buqendur acebḥan, bu tcacit ɣef uqerṛu, yerfa, irkeb-it umeskun, ur yeẓri acu ara ixdem, awal si zzεef yugi ad d-yali. Din din, s tεekkazt yellan deg ufus-is, yeɣli ɣef warrac-nni almi zgezwen, yal wa sani i t-iwwet ; aqaru, timecacin d uzagur, dɣa arrac-nni rewlen, yal wa sani yerra.

Ccix yegra-d netta d teydit-nni d yiḍan akken i d-ḍallen ɣer ddunit. Ccix yerfa ugar, ayen i d-yeqqimen di tɛekkazt yerẓa ɣef warrac-nni, ikemmel-it ɣef teydit meskint! Yekkat-itt nettat tettinẓi, tekker ad terwel, teẓẓuɣer mm-is, am tqeṭṭṭiṭ n weksum, yexnunes deg yidammen d uɣebbar ; mi tt-iwala akken, nnernan wurfan ugar, dɣa yewwet-itt s iḍarren-is, yerza-tt, teɣli, temrareɣ tmeɣbunt ; yebda yettneggiz ɣef uεebbuḍ-is, ɣef warraw-is, iḥerrem-iten ula ad walin tafat n ddunit ; aqjun aneggaru i d-ilulen, yekkes-as ccix amcum tamaẓẓagt n yemma-s i izemren ad-as-d-tefk tudert, inɣa-ten akken i d-frurxen, d ileqqaqen, allen qqnent. Imir yemḍerkal am win yeffeɣ leɛqel, yerwel s isuraf n win yenɣan, yerwel ɣer lǧamaε, yettu ula d ayen i t-id-yewwin…
Fɣen-d akk medden ɣer usarag, wehmen dacu akka yuɣen ccix….

Ttalsen-d daɣen : yiwet n tikelt dɣa, d taneggarut fell-as. Yiwet n tmeddit deg waggur n remḍan, ccix yewwi abrid n lexla, akken ad yesεeddi akud, iteddu, tteṣbiḥ deg ufus-is, yesgedruruz yeqqar Leqran, yettxemmim acu ara sen-d-iwwet tameddit-nni i yimẓulla, akken ad yerr at taddart s abrid n sswab ! Iteddu di teẓgi, yettu iman-is almi i t-iḥuza yiḍ deg webrid, yemmekta-d belli ilaq ad yuɣal ɣer taddart, akken ad d-yedden ; ma yella yezgel tudna, at taddart ad qqimen i laẓ, ur tetten ara ma yella ur sen-d-yeddin ara !

Nnig ugadir, anda t-yuɣ lḥal, asigna yettheggi akken ad d-yeẓmi iman-is, ad d-iseqqi tamurt s lesrar-is, yeqbeṛ ur yezmir ara ad yernu nnig wayen, am win yeṭṭef uberriḍ, ur yerǧi ara aṭas almi d yeqres igenni ɣef lqaεa ; lehwa d waḍu yettseffir, rrɛud yettseqsiq. Deg yiwet n tikkelt yeɣli-d igenni ɣef tmurt. Ccix ur yebɣi ara ad yebzeg, dɣa yerfed aqenddur-is almi d tigecrar, yeṭṭef-it s yifassen-is amar ad as-yaɣ aḍar ad t-yeɣḍel, yerna ad iɣiwel tikli. Yettazzal yettnadi anida ara yeddari, segmi kan ara tezri lehwa. Itezzi yeffus zelmeḍ almi i iwala yiwen n uεecciw yedduri s isekla, yewεar akken ad t-iwali yiwen. Yuzzel s lferḥ ad yekcem amzun d tiwwura n lǧennet i iwala. Mi yewweḍ ɣer din, yedardeb ar daxel kan akken, amzun d axxam-is. Akken yekcem, yufa yiwen n ilemẓi netta tlemẓit daxel-nni ddurin, yesduqqes-iten ccix, akken i ten-iwala, yefhem ixedmen dinna ur yelli d ayen yebɣa netta, ur yelli d ayen ara yeqbel ccreɛ n yigenni wala win n lqaɛa. Yufa-ten ttemsudanen ! Ccix, am win i t-yewweten s ujenwi. Mačči d takeffart n remḍan i tiɣaḍen, ala ! Segmi ttemsudanen, d ayen yugin ad yekcem s allaɣ-is, ur yelli dayen yezmer ad iwali neɣ ad yeqbel. Seg wakken ur yezmir ara ad yeṭṭef iman-is, icureɛ-iten din din, yemmeɣ fell-asen akken ad ten-id-izzuɣer s imawlan-nsen. Ilmeẓyen neṭqen-d ɣur-s nnan-as : “Acu i k-yuɣen akka ay aderwic ! Acu tebɣiḍ ?”…Yerra-yasen ccix s uxercuf :” Ilaq imawlan-nwen d wat taddart ad ẓren acu i la txedmem … ayen akka i la txedmem ur t-iqbil la ccreε, la lqanun…”

Nnan-as : “ Acu i ak-iruḥen, dacu twalaḍ akka nexdem-it? … Lhi-d kan d ccɣel-ik, d lǧamaε-ik, ayen nniḍen yexḍa-k , ur nelli d arraw-ik, ur telliḍ d babat-neɣ…”

Akken kan yesla s yimeslayen-nni yerfa nezzeh, ḥman-d yidammen-is, imuqel akka d wakka, amar ad iwali kra, dɣa iwala imceḍ n wuzzal, yeǧǧa-t bab n uεecciw-nni, yemmeɣ fell-as, yewwet-iten s iqerra, am wakken ara yewwet izerman, s yiwet n tyita i yiwen isen-ifka, yenɣa-ten menṭeq. Yenta deg-sen yimceḍ, yesni-ten am ddekkar, ur ufin ara ula ad slaqfen, seg wakken ur uḥtamen ara s tyita. Limmer xas s ubeqqa i ten-iwwet tili akken ara sleqfen! Ur yelli d tiyita n imceḍ-nni kan iten-inɣan, d lǧehd n wurfan-nni i s iten-iwwet i yewwin tarwiḥt-nsen. Yenɣa-ten akken yenɣa iḍan-nni ileqqaqen, ur xdimen kra.

Ccix, yuɣal-d ɣer tilawt, imiren, mi yezzi iwala idammen yuzzlen, tkecm-it tugdi, yugad ad t-id-afen, ad faqen i wbaxix i d-yurew di yiwet n tiremt, di tlemmast n waggur n remḍan, yeɣḍel snat n tmegraḍ s yiwet n tyita. Imiren kan, yerra-tt ɣef yiḍarren-is, yetni-tent, yefka lebɣi i tazzla ɣer sdat, tamuɣli ɣer deffir ulac, yettu agefur, yettu aḍu, yettu tuddna, remḍan, rebbi-s…Yettu ula d iman-is anda yella. Ala ayen yexdem i yellan deg wallaɣ-ines, a yettḥebbir amek ara yexdem, yeẓra dinna i kfan wussan-is, limmer ad as-faqen. Yettazal am yilemẓi, yettu ula d agadir-nni t-i d-iqublen, agu i d-yeɣlin d tallest i d-iḥezmen reglen-as iẓri, ur yeẓri anta tama iɣer ara yer. Agadir sdat-s ur ifaq, ur yuki d yiman-is. Lkaf n ugadir yefka-t i teẓra i t-yerǧǧan s lferḥ.

Ccix n lǧamaɛ tuffeg tcacit-is deg yigenni, yegra-d kan netta d uqendur-is amellal, aqenduṛ ara isdergen iẓerman-is, mi ara s-d-ger tmurt irebbi. Ccix ifelleq di lqaεa, yemmut, ur d-irri nnefs, ur d-irri nnehta, ulac ula d chada ! Mi akken yuffeg deg yigenni, i d-yeqqimen deg wallaɣ-is ala udmawen n yilmeẓyen i yenɣa, axaṭar myaḥmalen d teydit-nni d warraw-is yesfelqej wer sebba. Yemmut ur ẓullen ula d taẓallit fell-as, yegra-d d imensi i wucanen…

Azekka-nni, mi fuǧǧen wat taddart ɣef twaɣit yexdem ccix d-iseqqan tarbut n tlufa yeččatt teḥma! Ugin ad amnen.

Lammer ur yemmut ara imiren, tili ggulen ar d yemzel akken yezla sin n yiferraj ur uklalen. Nnejmaɛen, gezmen-tt di rray : seg wassen, ugin di taddart-nsen ad yili ccix n lǧamaε. Ma d lǧamaε yuɣal d amḍiq i tezdeg n wul d tejmaεt, din i ferrun timsal, d amḍiq n sswab, n leεqel akked lmeεqul…

Yura-tt: Murad IRNATEN